I Wanna Be Like Mike

Anyone see the basketball game last night? San Antonio beat Cleveland 75 to 72 in game three of the NBA Championships in what was the second lowest scoring game in finals history. If you missed it, I don’t blame you. I’m not much for watching the NBA myself, but I do try to catch some playoff games when I get the chance. Occasionally they can be entertaining.

Unfortunately I can’t say that for last night. With only a combined 147 total points, it was the slowest game in history for the finals, save for one other game. And that game was in 1955 when Fort Wayne beat Syracuse 74 to 71. If you know the mascots for these two teams, then you’re truly a better man than I. Heck, my dad wasn’t even born back in 1955.

I guess what I’m trying to say is that last night’s game was boring, incredibly so. Well, if you tuned in for the final say, three minutes, then you saw an exciting, down to the wire, game. But otherwise the game was merely a showcase for bad shooting, balls bouncing out of the rim, and refs forgetting how to call fouls against the Spurs (then again, that’s nothing new, just ask Steve Nash). But hey, the Spurs now have a 3-0 stranglehold on the Finals against the Cavaliers, so I’m happy.

Now don’t get me wrong, I have nothing against LeBron James. I mean, he’s younger than me, insanely famous, and Nike gave him $90 million before he played even on single NBA game. But hey, I’m not jealous or anything. Nope, not one bit… But I do have a problem with King James, and it is not in any way his fault. It’s all these stupid announcers and sports writers. For some reason, they keep saying he’s the next Michael Jordan.

Everybody is always looking for the next Michael Jordan, the next “big thing.” At one time they thought it might be Kobe Bryant or even Dwyane Wade. But now, it’s all about LeBron. If I do one thing in my life, I’m going to set the record straight. There is only one Michael Jordan. And he was born in Brooklyn, NY, went to high school in Wilmington, NC, attended the University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill, scored the game winning shot in the 1982 NCAA Finals and went on to win six, count ‘em, six NBA Championships with the Chicago Bulls. No one else even compares.

Now I might be a bit biased in this view. I was born in Illinois and therefore I have an affinity for Chicago based teams. I might also be biased because I’m an alumnus of Chapel Hill and the name Jordan is still 24 karat gold in that town. Or it might just be that I’m tired of hearing the same old tripe shit from TV announcers and I’m ready to move on already. Michael Jordan is the only Michael Jordan there ever will be. Kobe is Kobe, Wade is Wade, and LeBron, well, he’s only 21 years old. I think we can wait a few more years to find out who he truly is.

I could list all of Jordan’s accomplishments all of his various MVP honors, All Star game appearances, Olympic Gold Medals, and so on and so forth, but honestly, there’s just not enough room to write it all down. For the record though, it should be known that out of 1,109 games as a Chicago Bull, Jordan scored double digits in all but one game (March 25th, 1986 vs. the Cleveland Cavaliers). But there is one thing that Michael Jordan has, that Kobe Bryant and LeBron James will never have, and that’s a degree from the University of North Carolina.

Oh sure, MJ left college early for the NBA draft in 1984, and was even encouraged to do so by Dean Smith. He did go back in 1986, however, and finish out his degree in cultural geography. Now, I’m not entirely sure what cultural geography is or how it is applied in day to day life, but hey, he’s Michael Jordan. I’m pretty sure the University would have made up a degree just for him.

The number one thing that sets Michael apart from every other basketball player from the past, present, and future is his international stardom. Sure there are other superstars with multimillion dollar Nike contracts and their own brands and logos. But I’m talking about what Michael did not just for himself, his teammates, or the city of Chicago. I’m talking about the impact he had on the entire league. The National Basketball Association has never been more popular than when Michael was on the court. It was obviously less popular before and is still less watched after his final retirement. Even during his “baseball years” the NBA lost some of its fan base.

As long as he was on the court, wearing the now iconic #23 jersey the NBA flourished. But now, even with the LeBron James’s, the Kobe Bryant’s, and the Vince Carter’s the NBA just isn’t as popular as it once was. As I said before, there really is only one Michael Jordan. And that’s the way it’s always going to be.

And on a completely different note, due to my total fanboy love affair for the Transformers franchise, I now leave you with this week’s Transformers quote. Just remember, the new Transformers move comes out in three weeks.

“And the answer is: Unicron… Yes friends, act now, destroy Unicron. Kill the Grand Poobah. Eliminate even the toughest stain.”
-Wreck-Gar